Ahhh… The age of the superstar, the idol, the media icon. “Normals” want to date them, or be compared to them all in an attempt to be more like them or their lifestyle. These people are who they are because it is what their publicist says or even better, how the media portrays them.
I have always known that MTV had a large part in this.
M-T-V; The age 10-30 multi diversity conglomerate. Congratulations to them for their conquest of the brainwaves of any young adult of any diversity, of any region, of any culture, of any “clique” all over the world. I, for one, refuse to devote any part of my day to any program that first off, lost all track when the music videos were only being played at 3 a.m. and devote more time to the manipulation of the brainwaves through the airwaves (sound familiar? IT’S CALLED PROPAGANDA). We see these “stars” have it all, seen it all, done it all in the world. Nobody understands that they haven’t spoken for themselves since the day prior to signing their life away. And when they DO speak for themselves, have you heard the senseless gibberish that comes out of that hole in their face? From “George Bush hates black people” to “I get to go to a lot of overseas places, like Canada”.
I know I will get a vast amount of responses that say “you’re just jealous of them” or It’s cause they make more money than you” well if so let me clear that up. I will never be jealous of someone, unless that jealousy stems due to a wonderful deed, in which case, yes, who wouldn’t want to take the place of someone in a heroic act? And quite frankly, just because they make more money doesn’t mean they control it. Any purchases made that could influence them in another way through the publics eye MUST go through a publicist or an agent in order too not obstruct the “image” they have to maintain. You call them rich; I call them powerless, a puppet, and a pawn.
Ever get bored? Study into the actual lifestyle of a social icon! No wonder they write all those after-the-life novels about no one caring, feeling empty, drug addiction, and suicide. It’s their last grasp at fame! And when they begin to realize that still no one cares, they kill themselves or go into rehab. Why not? It’s the perfect closing chapter to the empty story they call life.
Too bad intelligence doesn’t make you look better in the Medias eye.
But what I am getting too is something that I enjoy so dearly when it happens to these “social icons” per say. The great fall from stardom. Absolutely funny. The beginning of the end as someone might say. When the drug habit goes public or when the hair clippers come out… Ahhh yes, Britney “take a hit one more time” Spears.
This has been a funny one. Since her and her booger sugar buddies have polluted my news waves with their cries for attention and more publicity, I have long waited this one…
Remember when this floozy was once said to be the “perfect icon for the typical teenage girl and not that whore Aguilera”. My oh my, for once the cage got shook. As I logged online today I had received several links to this video clip of a not-so-in shape, disoriented, lip syncing cow trying to grasp at what might be left of a good name for herself by parading (see: half stupor) around stage and murmuring chants like some fiend high off of a 3 day free-base binge. I smiled. I still can’t believe someone lets her raise children, I’d have better results giving a child to Michael Jackson (at least they would go to a carnival everyday and not be the responsible one to drive). Did you see the crowd reactions when she was center stage? Priceless.
So I have devised a checklist of how to know when that bright star you call yourself is turning into a black hole.
• Rehab check-in become as frequent as vacations. (They even have a rehab spa!)
• The only tabloid pictures are of you neglecting your children.
• You neglect your children
• *cough* child neglecter *cough*
• You’re so high when you get out of the car; the world gets a glimpse of your birth canal.
• When the world finally does see it, all the guys cringe.
• Half of which don’t believe it is what it is
• Your new best friends are recognized by the amounts of blow and blowing they do
• Your friend is Paris Hilton
• Seriously, do you think anybody would trust her with a multibillion dollar establishment?
• Your other friend’s hobbies include an 8-ball of coke and high speed joyrides
• Sex tape? Uh-oh, you betcha!
• Worth watching? Probably not!
• You married a back-up dancer oblivious to the fact you’re gonna get used.
• The only way your spouse can hit it off is by rapping (terribly)
• Than on top of that… He leaves you!
• Oh yeah, Mr. Dumb as a pole great white hype; is likely to win the custody battle
• Custody Battle? More like custody no-brainer
• You shave your ugly mug and cry about your parents not loving you!
Dream on hooker! You did this to yourself! So I found something suitable for this situation.
My prediction of what’s to come for Madam Spears (in no particular order)
• After album flops, so does idolism.
• Clinic within a year
• Book within 3 years
• Clinic within 3 years also
• Attempt at a return tour
• Fails
• Moves to Miami (they all seem to go there, must have free buffets)
• That E! THS remake on her life.
• No royalties
• Remember that tie she wore in that one performance? It’s used to keep her body up in the closet of her hotel room. Percocet and empty gold paint cans found strewn about.
• Jessica Simpson plays Britney in the made for TV movie entitled “Britney”
• Poor reviews
• Remembered as that “one chick girl that used to be really hot, ya know? Before all that stuff…”
• Linked to Clinton and some “Happy Birthday remix”. Cigars not present…
The joys of Stardom… We can only dream.