This only happens to me. It’s like I just attract this attention
The funniest most off the wall ice breaking/pick-up line ever used on me occured on a night out at the local pub. I was approached from behind by a cute blonde that whispered in my ear, “I’m a size 4 waist with 36 F’s.
I was speechless.
Very surreal..
Most of you girls out there would probably come right out and say “What a slut! Does she have no morals or respect?”
You must be insecure/jealous about something..
Automatically I thought in a semi-alcohol stupor who would say that as well. How many of you guys have heard this before? 1? Liar. Or how many girls have had a guy say… well nevermind, Imagine a cute guy approaching you and whispering the most sexually attractive thing in your ear to make you lose your cool. (In a hot way). It happened to me.
It was difficult to quit thinking about those 5 words and 2 numbers. “I have to talk to her, that is probably the most awesome woman I have ever came across”. Who is really that confident about their spur of the moment actions.. (Quit pointing at me) I bet a lot of you think you are, but let me tell you, when life hands you lemonades you accordinate. When I get handed lemons, (or in this case watermelons) I see me under center with 2 clicks left down by 5 and attempt to dissect the defense in order to win.
….When I’m sober….
Me “Sorry I keep poking you with my stick, (playing pool, funny) hi, I’m Matt
Her “Hi, I’m [name]
Me “Oh how easy, thats my moms name..
fuck…
Did my drunk ass seriously say that. Yes I did. I completely compared her to the giver of life herself.. Nice..
Luckily I made the save, or so it still seemed. But when it came right down to it… No wait… Screw that! You drink from 2 til midnight at the bar and try to hold a civilized conversation while maintaining your coherence to a complete stranger with huge breasts.. Thats what I thought, shut up.
Thank god I’m a buttguy anyways…